Out of the Adoption Fog
A poem and self-photograph by Emily Alber
As an adoptee, I feel a second timeline running parallel to my adopted life.
Out of the FOG, I am suspended in between; knowing my unadopted life didn’t exist, though a connection to that identity is truer than what I ever had here.
My adoptee affections polarize realities, causing reactions that unjustly inflict pain.
I can’t seem to touch life.
I will never be un-adopted.
Blood or non-blood, I never fully synchronize with members of either family.
Time in the beginning was chaos and time in the end is lost.
Reflection is delirium.
I exist here in solitude; perpetually searching for the answers to me.
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